I was riding through a snow storm
when I spotted the Xmas lights,
So I pulled into the driveway and shouted out a cheer.
When I got inside and started feeling a little warm,
a guy they said was a high school principal
stuck a prayer book in my hand.
He said he didn't like the fact that I didn't fit his norm,
From something I'd said he got the idea I was some kind of atheist,
and kept yelling about sin and such like he was suffering from a malfunctioning gland.
Well I've had some funky Christmases but this was the absurdest,
So i tried singing an uplifting Christmas carol.
But he didn't like my spirit,
So I put on my boots while he pointed me in the direction of the coming eternal peril.
Well I have to admit that he scared me,
And was just thankful I wasn't at a convention of principals in Las Vegas, Nevada.
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